Ex's and Oh's

It's been brought to my attention recently that people I've dated in the past have not been saying the nicest things about me. And honestly, of course that's fine. I also find it funny the things that they have been saying. It's funny because I can see the truth in them and also the persons insecurities that are tied into it. I think that the ego has a ton to do with it.

First and foremost, someone was recently talking about how he has to break up with me because he always felt that he was smarter then I was. I think it's stupid that at this age it even matters who broke up with who. And more so, I said I wasn't going to stop being myself to make you happy, so I guess you did choose to walk away then accept me as whole. I'd personally rather have someone walk away from me then want to constantly change me. I change for myself, when I want to, and I keep the things I like. And to be honest, I think I'm a pretty fucking cool person. As far as you being more intelligent (and for comedy reasons, I really hope I spelled that wrong (yes, I"m a horrible speller)), I think we are smart about different things. I may not know as much about certain gay things as you, but I know that I know a hell of a lot more about The Legend of Zelda then you, and I think that counts for something. I have no idea what you went to school for, and I've never seen you talk about anything with that much passion that really effects the world, so I'm sure I don't know what you are talking about. Different interest, absolutely, most smartest, I think not. ;-)

"Most smartest, look at that. Most smartest, I'm cutting you off Loretta. Let's go!"
-Drop Dead Gorgeous

And secondly, someone else said that he thinks I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. Well, congratulations!!! You seem to have known from when you were ten exactly what you were on the planet for, and honestly, you're not changing the world either. This is just funny to me, because he is right. There are definitely moments where I think, "what the fuck am I here for?" I think that's normal, I think that's okay. And at the time we dated, I was a little lost. Sometimes I still am. I'm more on course now, more then I ever have been, and I'm happier then ever.

Overall, I find both people to be amazing people. Sometimes crazy and delusional. But we all live in New York City and you kind of have to be. I'm not even angry, just smiling at how much people try to blame each other. At how much we try to point fingers and make yourself the victims. I am even doing it right now by even posting this. Poor me, everyone thinks negative, blah blah blah.

This could be the worst blog I've ever posted. I'm okay with that. Every now and then, I just have to write to put something out there.