Again

Vulnerability

Why am I afraid of my vulnerability
What if I told you I cried
What if I said that sometimes I feel you haunt me
What if I let you know I actually cared
Why is that so bad
Why is it so unbearable
So funny
So crazy to think anyone ever gave a shit for you
So what if I bared my heart
So what if I wrapped myself too tightly
Clung too strongly
So what if I wanted to kiss you forever
Why is it so imaginable for you to think
To understand
Why can't you grasp the thought that someone ever loved you
Don't you know how many people would kill for someone to give a flying fuck
Why couldn't you let me love you
Why am I so terrified of my vulnerability
What if I told you I cried
And if I still picture you on my couch
Why does that have to mean I'm too pathetic to let you go


I Thought

I thought maybe you could help me make him melt away
I thought maybe you'd be the answer
But you're not even part of the question
The equasion
I thought maybe I could count a little less
Forget about it all
Surpass and demise
I thought maybe through you I could see something else
I was wrong
I thought maybe by now things might be different
I thought maybe I could dance you away
Away from you
I thought maybe with all the lights and all the smiling faces
The gifts and pressence of all the love
Drink and pictures
All the creativity and expansion
I thought maybe I were big enough
And controlled
Sometimes I feel so empty
I thought maybe that would have disappeared
So empty
And full
And alive
I thought maybe at this point I'd still feel all these things
But with you
I thought maybe
Just for a second
I thought maybe
I thought maybe
I just really, honestly, I thought maybe